Roses Are White!

Be honest, the bests roses ARE white.

JANUARY! Month of...diets. I guess.

Not a lot really happens in January, does it? I mean sure there's New Year's Day but everyone knows that's just an extension of New Year's Eve and not really the start of January. January 2nd is actually the first day of the month. So in essence that poem is wrong and January does not have 31 days and all your forebears are lying to you.

February though! Oh now there is a month. The YEAR truly starts then. Seems to be a lot of birthdays that month, plus we all get paid for the first time since Christmas and suddenly our bank accounts aren't hollow abused things whimpering and recoiling at our very touch.

 For one it is home to 2nd Christmas; affectionately referred to by my loved ones as "Liam's Birthday". But to the uneducated and unenlightened it is shot through the centre by a heart-tipped arrow; I am of course talking about the universally reviled and adored Valentine's Day.

Time was Valentine's Day was as important to me as combing my hair, in that it only happened when someone pointed it out. By my late teenage years, after a rather unsuccessful attempt at university, I had become bitter and resentful of things, none more so than THAT day. But by my mid-twenties I was more adjusted, more mature (okay I still laugh at the word penis but come on! PENIS) and was generally a happier fellow. This brings us to now, a time when Valentine's Day is a day I look forward to. Not as much as 2nd Christmas though.

Because presents.

PRESENTS.

People will hate it because it reminds them they're alone, or because they say it's a lie conjured up by greetings card companies. You know, because Big Card are this sinister force run by overweight men in thousand dollar suits, smoking cigars wrapped in bible pages and drinking scotch chilled by frozen orphan tears. A lie because you should tell people and show them that you love them everyday. To them I say this:

YOU ARE WRONG

Tell'em Lexxy, baby!

We need Valentine's Day for one very good reason and that reason is simple: The affection shown on Valentine's Day means more because it is expected. Much in the same way not receiving anything can hurt more. Of course telling someone you love them everyday is great, but receiving flowers and gifts all the time would cause them to lose all importance. Imagine you could show off your beer belly in public 365 days of the year instead of the usual 312. It just wouldn't be a treat any longer!
It is important. Factor in the the truth about me, that beneath the rippling muscles, chiselled jawline, and flowing curled locks I am in fact a soft, squishy pile of mushy romantic, and Valentine's Day is a time I can make silly gestures and brighten someone's day even more.

How you celebrate the day is entirely up to you and yours though. Be it by going on a trip together, drinking alone, or simply buying flowers and snuggling on the sofa, a gift on the day of love is more than a gift. You don't have to buy a card. I for one hate buying cards for any occasion; they seem kind of pointless when you could do something for someone instead. Unless of course they're these cards.
Yes whether or not that little cherub has hit you with his arrow or if the little fucker was drinking on the job and hit the person next you instead, Valentine's Day is a good day. If you have that special someone (or someones you saucy polygamists) then there's no excuse to not celebrate the day. If you don't have someone to share it with though, well, there's no excuse not to brighten someone's day is there. Love or not.

After all, who doesn't like presents? Because PRESENTS.